He Seeks What Is Lost

Jesus said to him, “Today salvation has come to this house, because this man, too, is a son of Abraham.  For the Son of Man came to seek and to save the lost.”  Luke 19:9-10
The story preceding these verses speak of a man named Zacchaeus.  He was a tax collector, hated by the Jewish people.  When Jesus came upon the tree Zacchaeus was sitting in, Jesus called him down and went to His house.  As seen throughout the Gospels, Jesus spent countless hours with people such as Zacchaeus.  He dined with them and ministered to them.  And He forgave them, even the sins that we would have a hard time forgiving.

Read John 7:53-8:11

This passage speaks a woman who was brought before Jesus.  This woman had been caught in the act of adultery, a sin so great that the Pharisees and the people should have stoned her according to the Mosaic law.  When questioned about Jesus first answered with a simple statement, “Let any one of you who is without sin be the first to throw a stone at her.”  No one could throw a stone because all had sinned. 

When all the people had left, Jesus looked on her with compassion and said, “Go and sin no more.”

He had just forgiven one of the greatest sins, a sin worthy of death.  She must felt relief and confusion.  The Pharisees had brought her to him to be killed.  That is what Mosaic law commanded.  Instead, she was saved.  More than that, she was forgiven. 

Sadly, this is a sin that many feel the effects of.  The two caught in the sin are affected as well as their families and their communities.  Yet, Christ forgave her.

Consider how you have sinned against God.  This proved difficult for me for many years.  I struggled not so much with my own sin, but with the effects of another’s sin.  I couldn’t get past the fear that their sin had made me unforgivable.  I knew that I had not asked for it.  I certainly did not want it.  But I also didn’t stop it and didn’t tell anyone.  Because of this, I felt as if I was just as guilty as the offender. 

While I know that what had happened was not my fault, the feelings of guilt didn’t go away easily, until I realized that Christ forgives even the worst sins.  He forgives an adulterer and tells her to “go and sin no more.”  What makes me worse than that?  Who am I to doubt that Christ can forgive everything?  And who am I to say what He shouldn’t forgive?

I challenge you to consider this:  What do you doubt that Christ can/will forgive?  Why?

Beauty of Singleness

I have struggled with the desire to be in a committed relationship for some time.  No matter how hard I pray, the loneliness never seems to go away.  But tonight, I was reminded of something that I have forgotten, the Gift that being single has. 

1 Corinthians 7:34 says "An unmarried woman or virgin is concerned about the Lord's affairs: Her aim is to be devoted to the Lord in both body and spirit.  But a married woman is concerned about the affairs of the world, - how she can please her husband."

As a single woman, I have the gift of time, time to spend with my first Love: Jesus Christ.  Rather than mourning what we do not have, we should treasure this time when we can be fully devoted to God and seeking His will and His presence. 

The Father's Love

As a child and youth, I often felt rejected and dejected.  I didn't look like the "popular" kids.  I wasn't pretty or witty.  Instead, I was the kid who hated the way she looked, who was picked last, had the least friends.

Feeling like this, I felt like no one could ever care about me.  Amazingly, God cared.  He stepped into my life at a critical moment.  I had just come out of a difficult situation and was headed into dealing with the repercussions and healing.  We moved by the end of the summer, and I met a whole new group of kids who rejected me.  I threw myself wholeheartedly into learning about this God who loved me enough to save me and invest in me. 

But this is not about me.  It's about God.  Out of love, He sent His son to step down into time.  His Son lived and died to save us.  When His Son was raised from the dead, His Son overcome every pain, sorrow and punishment for sin.  He chose to love a broken people, broken by disobedience and stubbornness.  Even if we've been hurt by others' sins, we cannot deny our own.  When we recognize that we have no strength on our own, we can rest in Him and rise on eagle's wings.

My prayer for you is that God would step into your life and bring you to Him and His healing love and saving grace.  Never stop searching for the Father's love. 

"Vengeance is Mine"

"Your eyes are too pure to look on evil you cannot tolerate wrongdoing.
   Why then do you tolerate the treacherous?
   Why are you silent while the wicked swallow up those more righteous than themselves?"
             Habakkuk 1:13

When I read this, I thought of all the children who suffer at the hands of their "protectors."  Coming from a similar situation, it angers me.  I have often asked God why he doesn't stop the pain and suffering and why he allows his innocent children to be victimized.  It is hard to consider that God doesn't care about the suffering of his children, after all He sent His Son so that all may commune with Him eternally.  However, it is equally unfathomable that He would allow His innocent children to suffer. 

However, there is a hope.  This hope is voiced in Nahum, one of the minor prophets. 
"The Lord is slow to angerbut great in power; the Lord will not leave the guilty unpunished." (1:3a)

We know the phrase "vengeance is mine, saith the Lord,"  which comes from Romans 12.  However, I always had a hard time with accepting that God would avenge the wrong done to me and to those I knew, but the verse from Nahum gives us more of a hope that we will be avenged.

I do not promote harboring anger or seeking revenge or vengeance for the wrong you've experienced.  Recognizing that God will bring about vengeance is simply a step on the road to healing and forgiveness.  I pray that as you read this God begins your journey to healing.

My Comforter

Over the past few weeks, I have seen God as my provider and sustainer.  Given this, I spent time reflecting on the aspects about God I have seen.  He is Savior, Friend, and Comforter, among others.

Of these, God has most often been my Comforter, especially as I dealt with my past and struggled with my insecurities.  He would oft remind me that I am valuable to Him and have a purpose in the world.  He would teach me about finding security in myself and my relationship with Him.  No matter how often I would forget, He patiently reminded me that my life is His and He has a great purpose for me. 

This came into focus when I felt so worthless that I contemplated just giving up.  As I struggled through many sleepless nights and lacked ears to hear His voice, He patiently called me back.  When I came close to following through, He held me back and reminded me of His great love manifested in His church.

Here I am, 3 and half years later and He is now far more than a comforter.  He is Lord of my life and my story is not about me.  It is about God who loves us so very much that He would give His own Son to be the ultimate sacrifice.  How awesome and amazing He is! 

If you do not Christ as your Savior, there are many of us who are willing to share the truth of a God who would love you that much.  If you do know Christ as Savior, God is there with you every step of every day.  All you need to do is look to the cross and trust Him to save you.

Value In Christ

Recently, I ventured back out on the dating scene again.  Though it was not as successful as I had hoped, I learned the reward of being secure in who I am. 

As little as a year and a half ago, I had next to no security in who I was.  I felt like I needed a man to give me worth, even if it meant giving more than I wanted.  After yet another relationship ended, I decided to take a hiatus from dating and focus on my spiritual walk.  Through finding a church that challenged me to grow, I began to really understand that God values me and wants me to place value on who I am and my relationship with him.

I believe that He wants the same for you.  You do not need anyone to give you value. You are valuable as you are.  After all, "before I formed you in the womb, I knew you, and before you were born, I consecrated you." (Jeremiah 1:5)

Consider this truth.  While this specifically speaks to Jeremiah and his call as a prophet, the same truth applies to each of us.  God knew us, knows us and sees who we have yet to become.  And he consecrated us. 

Will you take this challenge, to seek value in God?  Will you trust that He gives you value and that you are valuable as you are? 

This week, I challenge you to seek God's truth.  Seek what His word says about the value He places on you, His creation.

Here are a few verses to get you started:
Jeremiah 29:11
1 John 2:2

Also, meditate on Christ's crucifixion and why He died for man.

All Things For Good

And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good for those called according to His purpose.
Romans 8:28

How awesome is that? God works ALL things for good. Any hurt you've experienced falls under this category. That abuse, those harsh words, pain of rejection. God uses all of these for good.

Challenge: Reflect on hurts that you've experienced. How can God use this for good?

Forgiving as Christ forgave

How can I not forgive when Christ suffered more than I know and yet He forgave?

This question has been on my mind the last few days and especially as I meditate on His death on a cross.  Christ suffered false accusations of guilt and rejection be His own people.  He suffered on a tree, crucified with criminals and treated horribly.  And yet, in all of this, He cried out, "Father, forgive them for they do not know what they do." (Luke 23:34)

How can I not forgive when He forgave those who beat Him and sentenced Him to die?  And how can I not seek His forgiveness and seek to be as Christ who chose to be a sacrifice for our salvation from eternal punishment?

Christ the Savior

Savior: a person who saves, rescues or delivers. (Dictionary.com)

Christ saves us from our sin and from ourselves.  He steps in at our darkest hour and brings out of the darkness into the light. 

In the ten years that I have known Christ personally, He has shown me this multiple times.  The first challenge was deliverance from my sin.  As I grew in relationship with Christ, I learned just how much He saved me and wants to save all people from sin.

Perhaps more personal to me was when I reached a point of such desparation and depression that I turned to thoughts of serious self-harm.  As I struggled to turn away from this depression, I saw God at work in my life.  He stepped in and walked with me through this dark time.  He saved me from myself and from my past.  And He saved me from this to His plan to bring Him glory.

I pray that God would work in your life and reveal His great love and salvation. 

Picture Perfect

Remember school photos?  Parents would dress up each child in the best clothes and send them on their way to school.  A few weeks later, a package would be sent home with the beautiful photos.

A few weeks ago, I browsed through photos of myself as a child and was saddened to see the light gone out in such young eyes.  Such a perfect picture thinly veiled the pain inside a young child.  How often we see this reality.

Fortunately, life goes on and we have a chance to rewrite our story by changing our future.  What are you doing to rewrite your present and future? 

A Reason For The Pain

Jesus answered, "It was not that this man sinned, or his parents, but that the works of God might be displayed in him."

John 9:3

 

The people had just asked Christ, "Who sinned, this man or his parents, that he is blind."  In the days of Christ's ministry, any infirmity or disability was viewed as a direct result of sin, whether that person's or the previous generation's.  Nothing just happened. 

When I read this passage, I internally jumped for joy.  I finally had an answer to this question, "why do bad things happen to good people?"  I struggled with this question in a more specific sense: Why did God allow me to be abused?  I knew that He would work good from the situation, but I just couldn't see why God would allow it or what I had done to deserve it.  I finally came to the realization that sometimes bad things just happen.

Bad things happen, but not without a purpose.  God has a plan to show His works through every situation if we would let Him.  Are you willing to let God work through your struggles and trials?  Are you willing to give it to Him that He may be glorified?

 

This does not negate the pain.  I know well how much it will hurt, even years after the fact.  However, to begin to heal, I have learned that I must look to God above who will help me through the pain. 

 

Challenge:  Reflect on a trying time in your life.  If it is recent, consider the ways God could be glorified and what His purpose may be.  If it is a more distant situation, consider what He has done through this difficulty and how He has shown Himself and His great works.

Value After Abuse

As a teen and college student, I struggled with seeing my value when much of my life had been filled with such horrid abuse.  All I could see, especially when I looked at my life through religious lens, was a person so dirty and invaluable.  I saw a person who was as good as trash, not as the valuable person God sees.

When I came to know Christ, I knew that He saw value, after all He died on the cross to save me.  However, this did not sink in until I went through a major depression.  I reached such a low that I considered ending my life and even gave God a deadline to change my mind.  Fortunately, God loves His rebellious and hurting child so much that He gave me such a strong answer that I could not give up. 

So, here I am, four years later.  While it is still a struggle to see the beautiful person God sees, I can now honestly say that God loves me, His beautiful and valuable creation, and that He saves us from our sin and, oftentimes, ourselves.

If you are hurting today, I ask that God would be with you.  Look to Him, and He will be with you, His beloved.

"Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, before you were born I set you apart; I appointed you as a prophet to the nations." 
                     Jeremiah 1:5

"When the going gets tough..."

Many of us have heard this phrase: "When the going gets tough, the tough get going."
This principle proves quite useful in times of extreme stress. Rather than run from the difficult situation, we are better running toward the problem and taking it by the horns.

One such case comes from my college years. I had reached a point of such mental exhaustion that it had started manifesting through very real physical illnesses over several months. Rather than quitting (an idea I sadly entertained), I kept fighting through it. I spent many days voiceless and many sleepless nights as I, with the help of God and many friends, fought through my inner turmoil.

Now, I find myself thankful for the difficulty I struggled through and the deeper faith God has blessed me with.

Those of you who are in the midst of a difficult time, I offer this advice. Keep pushing through it and fighting. You will be stronger for it.

Be True To Yourself

What a concept, to be true to oneself.  To do so risks losing friends, offending family and strangers, and true happiness.

With this post, I am speaking to myself as well as you.  I know how it feels to stand with friends and wear a mask or to be at home and not share your hurt.  Lately, I have gone through a period of self reflection with God and seen how I have stifled His work through me because I am not true to myself and real with the world around me.

Today's a new day and a time to make a commitment to be true to yourself.  Look in the mirror and embrace who you are, for there is no one else who is exactly like you.  Stand tall today as you tell the world your story and share who you are, even at the risk of being hurt.

God be with you.

One More Day

One more day.  A very loaded phrase. 

One more day with friends.

One more day with family.

One more day outside of a hospital.

One more day on the earth.

For some just one more day is a gift they can only ask God for.  Many of us have experienced the loss of a loved one and wished we could have just one more day to say goodbye.  This sorrow runs deep and can only be healed by time and grieving.

For others, one more day of life is a question that only the next day can answer.  They understand the uncertainty of life for their own is such.

I came to a crossroads that juxtaposed the two.  I felt such despair I questioned if I could continue on one more day.  And yet if I didn't and chose to end my life, I would leave so many wishing for just one more day to change my mind and heart, to show me that there was a life worth living.

Fortunately, God gave me strength to continue on just one more day and people to show me the reason to continue. 

If you are at this same crossroads, I beg you to wait just one more day.  Reach out to God and let Him save you in this very literal sense.  He can show life worth living and can heal your wounded heart and body.  Don't give up yet.  Keep holding on just one more day, one night, one more hour. 

May God be with you and heal you.

Invisible No More

Like so many, I have tried to be invisible.  I feared telling others about my past because I don't have the scars that people can physically see.  I carry scars deep within.  In fact, many are still open wounds that have yet to become healed scars.  

I began sharing my story when I reached a point that where my life was at stake.  I reached out for help... And met mixed reactions.  Those who knew nothing about it made light of the situationa and even accused me of doing it for attention.  Fortunately, I met with far more who understood enough to offer their support rather than their judgment.

Regardless of the reactions, I began to feel free.  I no longer had a deep, dark secret.  I had a story worth revealing.  I found that little girl who loved life and people.  I found the creative and happy part of me.  And I began to heal.

I am not invisible, even though the scars are.  I challenge you to tell your story.  Speak it here.  Talk to a few trusted friends or family members.  Shout it from the rooftops if you need to.  Never let anyone diminish the pain you suffer.  You are not invisible.  You are special and wonderful.  You are loved and deserved to be loved with a love that never hurts. 

May God bless you tonight and always.

Inner Beauty

The world glorifies the superficial beauty of a select few young people.  In America, this means being size 0 and looking like the supermodels we see on magazines.  For American men and boys, we glorify the muscular man who is also the smooth talker.  In other cultures, beauty is in having curves or having the rugged workman look.

These standards are nearly impossible for any of us "regular" people to reach in their lifetime.  The worse reality is that this superficial beauty is also finite.  In a few short years, we will fall well below the standards set by our world and culture.

There is a beauty that is worth far more than anything in the world.  Who you are inside, your personality, your love for people, is the most beautiful thing in the world.

As a teen, I knew one person who I envied more than anything.  She was the sweetest woman who gave everything to those who needed it.  She was never angry.  She always had a smile on her face and would lend that listening ear without judgment.  This woman was and is the person I wanted to be like. 

She was not the picture perfect supermodel.  However, she was the person you could count on, the one who knew exactly what to say.  She loved and laughed and always lit up the room.  It was her inner beauty that caught my attention.

What do you look like inside? Are you a pleasant person to be around, or are you superficial?

The Dream of Innocence

Tonight, I am finding myself a little stuck because I am facing a topic I know little of, innocence.  At a very young age, men stole my innocence by violating me in addition to other forms of abuse.

The sad reality is that many children have their innocence stolen from them.  So what now?  Do we wallow in self-pity and fear the world around us?  Do we allow the past to steal our future? 

I challenge you to something better, to surviving, thriving, and overcoming the past.  Let's make a stand and tell our abusers that they may have stolen our innocence by "educating" us at a young age but they cannot dictate our future.  They cannot take our happiness away. 

Stand strong, stand proud.  Overcome shame and be proud of the fact that you did survive and can overcome anything the world may throw at us.

Freedom

Today is the Fourth, my first alone.  I had two options, feel sorry for myself or thank God that I'm alive.  Fortunately, I resisted the former and spent the day being fairly productive.  This evening, I reminisced on older days, days with family and days remembering tragedy.

In America, we are blessed, though we rarely acknowledge it.  Yes, I suffered abuse at the hands of protectors.  However, I also had wonderful opportunities to go to school, meet new people and potentially better myself.  Even now, I am living over 1200 miles from my family, pursuing a Master's, and experiencing a new culture. 

In many countries, this would not be a possibility, especially for a young female.  At 24, I would already be married with several little ones or considered an old maid in many countries.  How awesome is it that I can say that I am a valuable person with opportunities to grow and choose my future.

I am also allowed to choose what religion to believe in and able to worship my God freely.  Some are not even afforded the privilege of openly or privately worshipping a God.  While we still must fight for the privilege to believe what we wish, the constitution affords us this privilege and even calls it a right.

So, today, and everyday, I will choose to thank God for the ability and opportunity to better myself and worship him.  I pray that you will thank God for these freedoms.  And for those of you who do not live in America and do not have many of these privileges, I pray that God will bless your life and help you to be all you can.

Learning to Love Yourself: Part 3

Forgiveness

Many a sermon has been on the difficult topic of forgiveness or rather learning to forgive others.  However, I have learned that the one person I needed to forgive the most is myself.  After all, how can I love myself if I cannot forgive even the smallest thing that God forgives.

Throughout my journey to healing from my past, I have struggled with getting over how weak I was, even though I was a child at the time.  I still find things I wish I could change.  But these grudges that I held against myself really held me back in my relationship with God. 

Here are a few tips to forgiving yourself. 
1. Acknowledge what you hold against yourself.  Put it into perspective with the situation or time.  Is this something you could have helped?
2.  Own it.  Even if it is something trivial, own what you struggle to forgive.  Perhaps it is a matter of feeling you should have been nicer to someone or you think you failed someone else or yourself.
3.  Be gracious.  Everyone makes mistakes.  You must be gracious with yourself and learn to forgive and move on.

In the end, the past is the past, the future a mystery.  Live in the present regret free.